Secrets
What is a Secret?
As moms and dads we have a lot to worry about in regards to our kids. We wish to secure them from all of lifes risks, yet we wish to accomplish this without putting unnecessary fear into their lives.
When my kids were small, we started talking about secrets. What is an excellent secret and what is a bad secret? This seemed to be a concept my kids could comprehend, while achieving my objective of not terrifying them.
Good secrets are things that you get to inform mommy or daddy. Such as we bought daddy a birthday gift. Today it's a secret however tomorrow we get to inform daddy. Another great secret is when the principal at school informs you there will be a party for your teacher however today it's a secret. Tomorrow however we get to tell the instructor.
As your kids get a bit older, a great secret might even be your buddy informing you she likes a kid. While your child may be asked not to tell the young boy, your kid could certainly tell you this secret.
So what is a bad secret? A bad secret is a secret that your child is asked to NEVER inform. A bad secret might be another kid admitting they did something wrong and asking your kid not to tell. It may likewise be an adult acting wrongly with your child and telling the kid to keep this a secret and not tell mommy.
My kids asked of course, "who will inform us bad tricks?". I started to tell them that bad people inform bad tricks, and rapidly recognized this is not true at all. Instead I selected to tell them that a bad secret can come from both a child and an adult who is doing something wrong. To this day I still think that only somebody doing something wrong will ask a kid to keep a secret from mommy or daddy.
My kids and I invested many hours speaking about tricks which mommy and/or daddy need to always be told tricks. I likewise guaranteed them that they would never ever get in problem for telling mommy or daddy a secret. I can keep in mind a couple of times, my kids slipping and informing a good secret when they weren't supposed to, but I kept my word and they never ever got in difficulty. You see, I have typically heard that somebody acting inappropriately will state "if you inform your mommy, you will get in trouble". I never desired my child to have a visual image of getting in trouble for informing mommy a secret.
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